By Annie Turner
A sermon delivered January 25, 2026 at Haydenville Congregational Church

We all know the scenario, we have been there before, right? We are jogging along, thinking things are pretty okay—well, not perfect but okay, all except for that ingrown toenail, the arthritis in our hands, and the dull, unexplained pain at the base of our spine—when bam! Suddenly something happens which is so awful that we are shot from guns from the “blessed” part of our lives into the “screwed” part of our lives.

Perhaps it is a diagnosis of cancer. I am very familiar with this one. When at my dentists several weeks back, awaiting my new crown, the dentist came in and said, “I have some bad news for you.” What, what? I have cancer in my tongue? I have to have all of my upper teeth removed and wear a plate forever? What? He told me that the wrong permanent crown had been sent to them, and I would have to wait for the right one to come. A problem in the lab of course. I wanted to grab his arm and say, “Baby doll, don’t ever tell me again you have bad news for me! That means cancer. A misguided crown is not bad news, just an annoyance already.”

Sometimes the swift disaster taking us from “blessed” to “screwed” is a car accident. Your honey goes off to the dump, to pick up a prescription, or a quick run to the market to get more carrots and spinach for a special recipe. Then a policeman comes to your door and you know, you know something awful has happened to your honey. Frankly, I am terrified that this will happen to me one day.

Or, as in my case last summer, you have a CAT scan ‘cause you are still symptomatic after getting salmonella poisoning. (Here’s a tip, my peeps: always wear nitrile gloves when handling raw meat.) and two days later your P.A. calls with bad news: “There is a 3 centimeter mass on your upper right colon, at the spot where you had a resection 10 years back. We need to get you in to see a colorectal surgeon.” Argh, argh, argh. This is bad news for sure, and I am feeling the g-forces pressing me back into my chair as I slam into the screwed territory once again.

Let’s look at some Biblical stories which contain the same awful journey from great to awful. Look at John the baptist, happily — or maybe not so happy as he wore camels’ hair clothing next to his skin which must have been pretty similar to a hair shirt, but hey, he ate locusts and wild honey so maybe he wasn’t overly fussy — dunking people into the Jordan and washing away their sins with that holy water. He even got to baptize Jesus and remove his sins, although, if you are Catholic or once were, you know that Jesus was free from original sin.  (I could go on about that very bad theology which was invented by St. Augustine and appears nowhere, nowhere at all in the Bible.) Unfortunately, John was swept up in Herod’s  ICE raid and thrown in prison where he languished, only to be condemned by Salome and her mom after Salome danced for King Herod.  Herod said, “I will give you anything you desire,” as he was so slain by her glorious movements. Salome had a whispered consult with her mom who told her—“Ask for the head of John the Baptist. The girl asked for John’s head. The king was horrified by this as he knew his people saw John as a prophet, and even he admired him. But a promise is a promise, so the next thing John knew, his head was on a bloody platter to satisfy the greed of Salome and her mom. If you are interested in learning more about this scene in art, check out the famous painter, Carravaggio, and his painting of  John’s head held, dripping with blood. It will remind you of the sheer terror and gruesomeness in many of the Bible stories. (Matthew 14:1-12)

Then there is Jeremiah, an Old Testament prophet who walked about preaching against corrupt rulers and clergy, always a perilous thing to do. Understandably, they were not happy with Jeremiah, and moving from blessed to screwed, he was thrown into a deep well without water, food, or any means of escaping until he was rescued at night by some kind-hearted folks.

And let us not forget Jesus. I don’t know if he saw himself as blessed, although his thousands of followers and disciples did. Perhaps he thought that making the mute to sing, the lame to walk, the deaf to hear, and the blind to see was a form of being blessed. I know I would! But then he slams into the screwed part of his life when Judas betrays him, the soldiers capture him, and he is flogged until streaked with blood, crowned with thorns, and is crucified. I don’t think anything can top this for being screwed. Although God had other plans, seeing as God resurercted Jesus from the dead and had him appear to Mary Magdalene, the disciples, and many others in the upper room. So maybe he then saw himself in the blessed category of his life.

What do you do when you suddenly slam from the great parts of your life into the awful parts? When a beloved suddenly has to be hospitalized and medicated to control either seizures or mental illness? When your mom gets lung cancer and dies at age 55 leaving you bereft?

Here are some of the things that I do when I am shot from the blessed gun and landed in screwed territory. You may well have your own coping strategies and ways of making things less awful.

1 I join support groups. When I had cancer, I joined an internet group of cancer patients and survivors to learn—“How did they do it? What worked for them? What didn’t?” I felt held and blessed by the members of my group as they shared their experiences, their medications, side effects, and how they recovered at the end. and incidentally, anyone here dealing with cancer or who has a dear one with it, purchase a book called, “Picking Up The Pieces,” all about how you cope once your treatment is over and you are trying to put your life back together. I found it very helpful.

2. I started a cancer blog about my own journey, sharing my story, posting at least once a week or more. This really, really helped me. I talked about trying to put on makeup with shaking, trembling hands from chemo, using an abstract painting of Picasso’s to show what my face felt and looked like. Using humor really helped me to survive this deeply screwed part of my life.

3. I made sure I got outside for at least 15 minutes a day or more. Because I had leg neuropathy from chemo and my balance was not terrific, I walked with a pole up and down, up and down on our big front deck. I know I am privileged and blessed to live where I do where I can look out over the Pioneer Valley as I stumped along.

One day, sobbing at the turn my life had taken, I stopped at the end of our deck and looked down on the stone wall. I saw a chipmunk darting in and out of the stones, intent on food, its tail straight out. Somehow the intense, vibrating life in that creature sustained me. My tears stopped, relief flooded my heart, and I began walking again with a lighter step. Nature sustained me and continues to hold me up.

4. When my mom died and I was bereft, I joined a hotline to help others. This doesn’t always work for us so please do not beat yourself up if it doesn’t, but for me—being of service to others helped me in my deep grief. Both Rick and I got trained by the marvelous therapist Gerry Shamess, who once worked in the Smith College School for Social Work and who became my own therapist in time. We learned how to listen, how to ask the right questions, and how to direct people in distress to helpful resources. If someone was suicidal, we learned to ask, “What is your plan? How are you thinking of doing this?” The more specific the plan, the more in danger someone was.

5. I put on very loud Detroit Motown music and danced around the living room. Music helps our souls when we are in distress. Dancing rearranges the molecules of your body when you are in trouble. Don’t ask me if this is scientific. I just know from experience that it is true.

6. In the “Once And Future King.” when Merlin is asked how to deal with hard things, he said, “Learn something new.” I have found this to be true. Our very own amazing therapist, Carolyn Dubois, once came up with four things her clients could do during the COVID lock down to keep themselves steady. 1. exercise. 2. reach out to someone else in an email, text, or phone call. 3. do something creative. 4. learn something new. And i would add, 5. do something for someone else—bake cookies, give alms, give someone a ride to church, or another thing to help.

And following Merlin’s advice to learn something when in the midst of hard times, here are a few of the nifty things I have learned lately scrolling through  Facebook.  I follow the astronomer Neil Degrasse Tyson and he always has amazing new, scientific discoveries. Here are a few things I learned:

— They are developing a vaccine for cancer, for many kinds. I know Russia is putting their cancer vaccine out there already for folks to take.

— When you cry, cortisol is in those tears you weep from grief or sadness. This is healing, not like the tears from your eyes when it is cold or windy.

— They have found oxygen in the deepest, darkest parts of the ocean, surprising all scientists and baffling them.

6. Read something inspiring. I read scripture daily, books by Anne Lamott, Barbara Brown Taylor, Henri Nouwen, and many Catholic books as well. And I have to add—read poetry if you can! Poetry is to your brain and heart like dancing is to the molecules of your body. It rearranges the sad, dark parts and makes them into golden, warm parts. There is something about the rhythm of words which takes you to a better, blessed place. It is a very old rhythm, for we know that ancient peoples told stories and myths around the campfires, linking themselves to each other with the words and emotions within. We are creatures of story.

I have been reading a book by Eric Metaxas—yes, he is Greek—about miracles, as I am fascinated by them and also deeply believe in them —  although seeing the Virgin Mary in a cheese sandwich is a place too far for me — and he speaks of how C.S. Lewis came to believe. He was friends with Tolkein, who was a master of Norse myths. When Tolkein spoke to Lewis he basically said, “Yes, Christianity is a myth but it is a true myth.” and that poked a hole in Lewis’s heart where Jesus entered and sat down, never to leave. If you have never read, “Mere Christianity” by Lewis, run right out and buy it, because it is one of the best books on Christianity i know, along with books by Walter Brueggheman and Richard Rohr.

Find ways of your own that sustain you when life slams you into the territory of being screwed. I know you know them. I am sure you have pulled yourself out of the slough of despond in the past with things that only you know. You are a brilliant master of yourself, your psyche, and your emotions.

And when none of the known remedies work to help you return to #blessed, pray. Pray your ass off. Do not stop. Do it all day long and well into the night. When you get up to pee at 2 a.m., keep praying. Some of us get up 2 times per night to pee, sigh, but those are good times to spin the prayer wheel. Just do not stop. and know that God is holding you in the warm palms of her hands. If we were truly aware, we would know that we are always in those warm hands, have never left them, and when we pass on to the next life, also known as a change of address, we will be holding God’s hand, just as Jesus reached down into the stormy waves to grab hold of Peter’s hand as he sank in fear. Jesus pulled him up and out and put him into the safe boat, just as he will with you. Trust me. This is something  I know and would stake my life on.